What does a hotel concierge do?

I used to travel a lot for work and years of forgetting things, running out of things and looking for things to do has led me to believe that the concierge is the MVP of the hotel world. Their job is to make guests happy, and I’d imagine that would involve some fairly bizarre, wonderful and sometimes unpleasant requests. We are staying in a hotel right now and  have used some of the traditional requests like bringing up a cork and wine glasses so often that they now just leave fresh ones for us. But add two year old toddlers to the mix and we’re really exploring the limits of what a concierge will do.

Examples:

1. A hotel concierge will slightly panic when you come into the hotel demanding booster cables and start calling every hotel staff to see if anyone has any if you are scary enough. A concierge will not be able to actually boost your van though for liability reasons. This will make sense to you the next day, but not while your van is stuck in the parkade. The concierge will be kind to you no matter how much you freak out.

2. They will arrange cleaning staff to come to your room and deliver various bags when your son’s poopy swim diaper melts all over the bathroom and ruins a towel. The cleaning staff will not actually help you clean it up though, and you will ponder whether it makes more sense to throw the towel away and risk being charged for it or to put it in the laundry bag they’ve provided and hopefully let them throw it away. And in the future bring only your own towels for use at hotels because now you know what kind of abuse hotel towels take.

3. They will learn your name after you freak out at the restaurant staff for serving your toddlers raw hamburgers. Especially if one hamburger has a large piece of plastic in it. In fact, after that happens, they will pay for your meal, your internet service, your parking and just about any other thing that you want.

When we checked in we were behind a line of unruly musicians who were bound to cause trouble. I bet none of them shit on any towels though.

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